sadly i felt like the above for most of today, only more blue instead of black. i just couldn't shake it which is not like me. i think maybe it was because i was 'tired and emotional' as mum would say. that, and the fact that i had drinks until late the night before. it also didn't help that matt woke me up 'still in the sixes' as i quoted to him, meaning it was 6am something. it makes me so cranky that he sleeps like a log during weekday mornings but springs to life on the weekend. how does his body know the difference so well and why do i have to feel like doing the exact opposite? is a sleep in too much to ask for after a long week? so it was a pretty crap day. i felt like a) curling up in a ball, b) sleeping and c) crying/sooking. i think i did all three in the end. poor matt. my day did turn around in the end though. i found that when i went home (after spending the week staying over at matt's house) and unpacked all my things i started to feel a little more motivated. then i filled out some forms i'd been meaning to complete and send for weeks and my mood shifted a little more. after that i drove down the road to oxford street and bought some pretty tulips and a birthday present for ash. by this stage i almost felt back to being me again. add some sushi, nail polish and getting dressed up for ash's birthday dinner and i was well and truly over my mini meltdown. and while it seems so silly and short-lived now, it really was a horrible feeling and i feel for those that feel like this all the time.
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