new beginnings

i just had to share some of the gorgeous photos taken at the polo last sunday. (i didn't share this one though! also note the lack of any actual polo match photos!) i have been spending lots of time with jess, megan and susanna and these girls have been making me feel seriously happy and full of life again. thank you ladies! jess and i went to high school together but didn't become close until recently when she also started at virgin australia. she now works at a different company but still manages to coordinate all of our social lives on the side! and we love her for it. (well i do anyway!) i've always wanted more close girlfriends to spend time with in brisbane. since jess has been in my life i've done lots of things that i normally wouldn't have. last night i went to a free comedy night at the powerhouse (hilarious!) with all of the pretty faces you see below. i've been saying 'yes' to almost anything as well as trying some new things on my own. most recently i took myself out for breakfast to a cool place that i had been wanting to go to forever called sourced grocer. there i tried blue cheese for the first time (strong!) and ran into another friend of jess', sarah. she told me all about her yoga retreats and healthy living and eating and it was really inspiring. even before our catch up though i had been thinking positively, eating well and exercising almost everyday. i even signed up at naomi's gym tonight! the changes are tinged with sadness, as this new chapter of my life has begun as another one ended, with my relationship coming to a final close recently. i've always been a happy, positive person, but the past year has been a difficult one emotionally speaking, and i felt myself slipping further away from the confident, independent person i once was, despite being with someone who was very loving, patient and supportive. somewhere along the lines i lost who i was and my self confidence evaded me, causing all kinds of heartache. it's also hard to love someone who doesn't love themselves or their own life first, and part of the reason we decided to part ways was so that i could focus on doing exactly that. so that is what i intend to do! as dramatic as it sounds, i feel like i'm starting to choose life again. why frown when you could laugh or smile. why worry when you have so much.. your health, home, job, family, friends, beautiful brisbane and the list goes on. i want to better myself in every way possible, especially on the inside, where it really counts. embracing new friends is a part of this journey. of course kahli, naomi, beth, anna and all of my beautiful friends in sydney and melbourne are irreplaceable, but i'm really excited about the possibility of having even more life long friends. and as hard as it was at first, i'm grateful for this fresh start and free time! i'm no longer consumed with making someone else happy, or scared of being alone, instead i am living my own young and care free life. it feels good, exactly how life should feel! ♥

lovely gals (and guy!)

jess

susanna

megan

feel it all

being tender and open is beautiful. as a woman, i feel continually shhh’ed. too sensitive. too mushy. too wishy washy. blah blah. don’t let someone steal your tenderness. don’t allow the coldness and fear of others to tarnish your perfectly vulnerable beating heart. nothing is more powerful than allowing yourself to truly be affected by things. whether it’s a song, a stranger, a mountain, a rain drop, a tea kettle, an article, a sentence, a footstep, feel it all – look around you. all of this is for you. take it and have gratitude. give it and feel love. 

 — zooey deschanel 




this reminds me so much of my beloved big blue eyed friend beth. she called me on friday night from the beautiful wedding reception of a close friend of hers - see above! 'don't you think everyone deserves to find true love jess' and 'isn't it amazingggggg' were just a couple of the things she gushed over the phone to me. she was hilarious and it was just what i needed at the time. she had mum and i in stitches of laughter. little did she know she was on loud speaker, making her all the more candid. although she may have had a champagne or two (or many!) this level of expression, passion and wonder is the norm for beth. she finds beauty in everything and takes the time to truly stop and smell the roses. and we all love her for it. she told me she frustrated her travelling companions in america because she took too long looking at the sites and wanting to take photos of every little detail. i think that's the best way to be. beth, you are a true inspiration to me and so many people in your life. i hope you know it, and i always say, never change. ♥ 

don't cry