more and more, i am starting to imagine the life i want and i am finally starting to take steps, only baby ones, towards it. it's exciting and it's giving me a new sense of purpose which is something i feel is missing from my life for the first time in a long time and it might be why i feel a bit lost of late. i'm no longer working towards something. i've always had an education to finish, a new job to start, a new city to move to, a city to move away from, a home to return to, a life to try and plan with matt. then one day recently i woke up and found myself stuck, not moving forward or where i thought i would be. the other night beth showed me a list that she wrote during a time when she was probably feeling much the same way as i have been. it was amazing to see just how many things she had achieved from that list since then. she had bought a unit, moved out of home, gone travelling overseas (twice), got her savings in order and she had done a million and one other things. it was so lovely to see her holding this bit of paper with scribbled notes all over it, written over a whole year or more ago, and to see almost everything crossed out. i'm going to do the same, imagine a new story for my life, write it down and then start living it.
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